Mouthful of Koryn

maybe i’d matter if i disappeared,
if silence screamed the things you always feared.
if all the words i wasted near your side
returned as ghosts that burned where you would hide.

right now i’m nothing but a shade,
a hand you never hold, just a name that fades.
a shadow slipping past your careless eyes,
a fleeting presence no one will baptize.

but death could twist the world to finally see,
make all my absence weigh eternally.
turn every quiet moment into cry,
and crown me with the ghost of one last sigh.

i hate that thought, it coils beneath my skin,
a bitter truth i carry deep within.
the question lingers hotter than a flame:
“would losing me be how you learn my name?”

i’ve begged for space inside your fleeting mind,
for something soft, for something i might find.
but living leaves me hollow in your view,
like i am less alive the more i’m true.

so i imagine stillness tearing me apart,
a colder, darker art than any heart.
where absence screams and pulls me to the ground,
and all my broken pieces gather around.

and then you’d feel it, sharp, relentless, late,
the kind of love that only comes with fate.
but i would never know, i’d never see,
if dying is the only way to make you miss me.